It's hard to watch the American sitcom How I Met Your Mother and not wish that Barney Stinson comes to life and provides your group of friends with 24/7 entertainment.
But, as much as we love Barney's character, we can't help but find an uncanny resemblance with the typical Lebanese douche-bag, aka the jagal.
1. He's rich but no one really knows what he does for a living
Ah... the mystery of the Lebanese jagal's source of living. It leaves one's imagination wandering to dark places.
I mean, how does he flaunt topnotch brand-names from top to bottom, party with A-listers every other night, drive expensive cars... all the while smoking shisha in al-Falamanki until 6 a.m. on weekdays?!
Ask him about it and he'll probably give you a shady answer or brush it off with something similar to Barney's: "Uhh, pleaase".
2. He has wasta for everything
The Lebanese jagal knows "a guy" to resolve any situation he encounters, especially when it comes to bending the law to his convenience.
He knows a guy who can get his official papers done in half the time they usually take, a guy to seat him at the VIP section at a Riyadi-Sagesse basketball game he doesn't even have tickets for, and of course, a guy at every club in Beirut and Jbeil...
And if he doesn't have a guy for something, he will call up his "guy guy"-- a hotshot who's capable of getting anything done due to his wealth and/or political affiliations.
3. He has a thing for Lebanese women
Every Lebanese probably got hooked on HIMYM after watching the pilot, in which Barney says he has a thing for Lebanese girls. Barney also mentions Lebanese women later in the show, saying, "Lebanese girls always rush to third base and then stay there."
Lebanese guys often obsess over foreign women too, especially those hailing from Russia and Sweden.
4. Commitment issues
On his wedding day, we saw Barney second-guess his decision for fear of missing out on meeting other women. For that same reason, many Lebanese guys dread commitment and tend to keep women clinging to a thin string of hope that maybe one day the relationship would become legit. But, it rarely ever does.
5. There's nothing OK about the way he picks up women
He thinks that politely approaching a woman and expressing interest in her is too mainstream or too noble for his ego's taste.
So, he would rather use cheesy, degrading and obnoxious pick-up lines, with a side of lies -- like what he does for a living or his marital status.
6. He doesn't take no for an answer
"She's single and doesn't want to go out with me... then, she must be playing hard to get."
This is what goes on in many Lebanese guys' heads whenever they are turned down by a woman because her being simply not interested is out of the question. "Enu walaw, ma3e Lamborghini w mestelem sherket bayye... what more could she want?"
7. The Bro Code
Barney started a Bro Code - a set of rules for other "bros" to follow.
The Lebanese jagal puts his bros in high regard as well... I mean, isn't "khayye" his favorite word?
The unwritten, but commonly known, Lebanese Bro Code definitely includes something along the lines of "A bro doesn't let another bro get into a mashkal alone" and "A bro shall never go out with a bro's sister".
8. He objectifies women
Before marrying Robin Scherbatsky, Barney was the epitome of a douche-bag who views women as objects that are only there to fulfill his pleasures. He uses lies and schemes to fool them into going out with him.
Similarly, the Lebanese jagal has twisted views regarding women and tends to objectify them as well.
9. Patriotism with a side of racism
Barney thinks that Americans are better than Canadians, the Lebanese jagal thinks that Lebanese are superior to all other nationals.
He might praise Westerners every once in a while, but there is no doubt in his mind that some Easterners, including Arabs, are inferior.