In our weekly installment of Clients from Hell, a hilarious collection of anonymously contributed client horror stories from designers, we present "I am hiring someone else to do your job." For previous posts, click here.

A client that I did a lot of work for on a much-reduced hourly rate because they are a friend of a friend contacts me.

Client: Can you send me the file for the last flyer that you designed for us.

Me: Sure, I’ll send it via email.

So I send them a PDF file. Client emails me back.

Client: Can we have the Photoshop file please?

Me: Sure. Here it is.

I send them a PSD. Client emails me back.

Client: No, this isn’t the right file. We need one with all the bits separated. Can you send it to me please?

Me: You mean you want the Photoshop file with all the design elements on separate layers?

Client: Yes. Can you send it?

Me: Can I ask what you want it for?

Client then calls me.

Client: Look I just need the file of my flyer! I’m on a time schedule here and need it ASAP! I don’t understand why this is so difficult for you to understand.

Me: I understand that you want the file. I asked you what you needed it for?

Client: We need the designs.

Me: Why do you need the designs?

Client: Because we’re having a poster designed. The Graphic Designer needs the layers from your flyer so that he can put them in to the poster.

Me: In that case then no, you can’t have the file.

Client: Why the hell not!

Me: Well because I don’t want to send all my work to another graphic designer so that he can take my designs and ideas! The design elements belong to me.

Client: But I paid you.

Me: Yes you did. You paid me to design a flyer for you. I did that. What you paid for was the final design, the individual elements that go into the design belong to me.

Client: But we need them! I’ve already paid the other designer!

Me: Well if you have paid the other designer, then surely he can design something for you? He will have to use his own design ideas though, not mine.

Client: But we love your designs! You’ve designed everything for us and we want the poster to match all the other designs!

Me: Well… maybe it would be better if I design the poster for you then?

Client: But we’ve already paid the other designer! We haven’t got the budget to pay you as well!

Me: I’m sorry but this really is not my problem. Perhaps you should not have paid the other designer up front.

Client: I paid him because he wants much less than you charge to do the same job! He’s my neighbour’s son, he’s at college and has your Photoshop thing and said that he could do it for £20 if I gave him all the bits to use. You charge loads more than that!

Me: Let me get this straight. You want me, a fully trained Graphic Designer with over 20 years experience to send all my beautiful and carefully thought-out design work to a college student with zero years experience so that he can mash it together how he sees fit into a different format? You also do not want to pay me for this as you have already paid out a whopping £20 and have no budget left. Is this correct?

Client: Why are you always such a difficult bitch ?!

For context, this client runs a large business and lives in a 16-bedroom house. I have politely refused any further work from them.