The Dubai clubbing scene is nothing if not a cast of characters. You're bound to have some sort of encounter with a total stranger that's also totally familiar to you. He/she is a certain type. And most of the time it's so absurd, it's practically cartoonish.
These are the Disney cousins of the clubbers you meet.
1. Gaston from Beauty and the Beast
He’s the flex-machine guy with serious body hair issues who thinks he’s a gift to all women. He’ll generally approach you with very lame pick-up lines and hold you by the waist while talking to you. He also loves to dance salsa for some reason.
2. John Smith from Pocahontas
Blondly bland? Blandly blond? Whatever it is, meh. His personality is as interesting as a vacuum cleaner. But hey, at least he’s good looking. He’s more of a “I’ll just stand by the bar and look pretty” kind of guy and don’t expect him to approach you! You’ll most probably see him in Zuma or other fancy DIFC bars.
3. Li Shang from Mulan
The serious and rigid stunning guy who’ll eventually start smiling after the 10th drink. No dancing, no drinking, he’s got gym and his GMAT tomorrow morning. Why is he out? Because it’s part of the fun he added to his tight schedule.
4. Aladdin from Aladdin
He’s got a great smile, an attractive face, cool friends around him all the time and he looks loyal and kind. But the outfits man, the outfits are a deal breaker!
5. The Beast/Prince Adam from Beauty and the Beast
His eyebrows are way fiercer than yours. He actually uses "fierce," talks about his mom a lot and says “yay!” He’s just confused. Feel free to meet him in 360 or Cavalli.
6. Prince Charming from Cinderella
- He stares into your eyes all night and tells you you’re the love of his life.
- Dances with you the entire night.
- Can’t remember what you look like next morning.
7. Ursula from The Little Mermaid
She’s contoured her face like Ronald McDonald and has a gown on that's at least one size too small. She’ll probably high five you in the club’s bathroom for no reason whatsoever!
8. Aurora from Sleeping Beauty
She just wants to sleep all day with full make-up and a tiara on, until some rich guy finds her and marries her. She’s the princess in Louboutins in DIFC bars. Her theme song? “Now I ain’t saying she’s a gold digger, she ain’t messin’ with no broke broke...”
9. Princess Jasmine from Aladdin
She’s annoyingly perfect with her perfect nose job, boob job, extensions, lashes, accessories, crop top... And she knows it. You’ll generally find her at the club looking angry and blasé for no particular reason.
10. Ariel from the Little Mermaid
Ughhh. That girl who’s always talking about positive energy and “never giving up on your dreams." She hardly changes her attire and she probably just hopped from a boat trip in Marina straight to Pier7.
11. Cruella Deville from 101 Dalmatians
She is by far our favorite annoying encounter. She has a very well-pronounced accent... She’s 23 going on 53, loves fur, hates PETA, smokes thin loooong cigarettes, caviar is her go-to meal and she has Roberto’s and Jean-Georges’s numbers on her speed dial.