With winter comes the usual: cold, coats, rain and a special version of your mom nagging all the time.
We know she means well, mothers always do. But it's just so hard to take her advice when she recommends you wear 20 sweaters before going to the dekkene downstairs.
These are some of the other things she "recommends" ... (and she won't let you leave the house otherwise).
1. You're never dressed warm enough
What is it with mothers and thinking you're never wearing enough clothes?
When it's cold outside, you could be wearing a live sheep strapped to your back, and your mother would still think you need another coat on.
2. Your sickness is always because of the cold
No matter what sickness you're suffering from – be it a headache to a broken leg – if you complain, your mother will say it's because of cold air.
Me: "Mama my head hurts."
Mom: "It's because it's cold hayati, you should listen to me and wear more clothes."
Me: ??!?
3. Rain requires A LOT of preparation
OK, it's raining outside. Your mother has prepared you your whole life for this moment. If you don't have an umbrella, a hat, a raincoat and boots, you weren't listening!
If you've learned well ... Go forth!
4. No little piggies
Your feet have to be covered at all times in winter. Otherwise your mother will be convinced you're going to get pneumonia from the cold transferred through your feet (see #2).
Just don't even try to wear anything other than boots during the winter.
5. Just dress like an onion!
Dressing like an onion is a staple. Everyone from my mother to my choir teacher said this. Layers are a necessity along with a warm hat.
Always wear 2amees otton (undershirt). Don't even think about going without one.
P.S. Three layers or less is not layered enough!
6. 3asfi = End of the world
If there's a 3asfi (storm) brewing outside, it's truly better if you just stay home. Trust me, you don't want your mother to turn into a tornado cause you want to go out in a storm.
Me: "Mom, I need to go."
Mama: "Shou!! Fi 3asfi barra! Majnooneh?"
It didn't matter at the time that I had to go to work ...
7. Sickness spreads through water in the cold
If you have wet hair, wet pants (from rain) or anything covered in water, your mom will be convinced you're trying to kill yourself. Just don't.