You just had a great jog on the corniche and you pass by Starbucks for a nice macchiato. Brace yourself, you're in for quite an experience.
1. Queuing injustice
Just because you're standing in front of the guy the barista knows personally, it does NOT mean you get to order before him.
2. Further queuing injustice
If the one standing behind you is a girl the barista is interested in, you should also let her pass because you won't be ordering before her. (when the barista is a guy… mostly)
3. Wall stare
It's your turn, but Samir is taking his 10th cigarette break this morning and Randa took the day off, so there is only one person operating the whole process. You gotta wait.
4. The joke
Don't you dare order without laughing at the drastically lame joke the barista will crack before you order - it'll most probably depict the delay and/or how exhausted he/she is.
5. Mistakes
"Caramel macchiato skimmed milk please"
"OK, caramel machhiato"
"Skimmed milk please"
*receives order with normal milk*
6. Seattle's finest
All of a sudden, the barista forgets all forms of languages and can only recognize Starbucks terminology. Your small, medium, and large mean nothing: it's tall, grande, and venti over here.
7. Voice change
"one caramel macchiato FOR GHASSAN"
Why and who are you yelling to? It's just the two of us! And why has the pitch of your voice changed?
8. Name freedom
Your name will be correctly written only if it's three letters or less. Otherwise, it's mix and match day for "Krasteena" and "Leen/Lynn/Lyn/Lin/Line".
9. Life coaching
While the barista is preparing your drink, a conversation about life must strike up, and you must look interested. Usually, it'll end with "tell me if your drink isn't good, eh ?"
10. The look
LIES. When Starbucks promised to change your drink if you're not satisfied with it, they meant to rule out Lebanese baristas, because unless you know the manager, you'll receive a death stare that'll make you love your drink and never dare to ask for a new one ever again.